[*** The FINEST English Pub Ever ***]

Sat Jan 23, 1999
When Sybs popped in for a long overdue visit recently the conversation really took flight…

* SuzW remembers the day Sybs drove the bus around inside pub and gave us all a ride
<Sybs> LOL... I remember that
<Sybs> now... where did I leave that double decker
<JesseJ> you got a bus..??
* LordOnion gives the bus to Sybs
<SuzW> someone like Pootle was playing the drums for us inside
<tessie_> I was here for that bus ride
<Sybs> awwww reunited again!!!
* Sawdust wonders whether he should hop on the bus
<tessie_> Dust .. no yours is the short yellow bus :)
* Sybs climbs in the bus and rings the bell.... its the No 64
<Sawdust> the one with the bars in the windows?
* SuzW hops on the bus
<JesseJ> does this bus go to SOHO?
* SuzW gets out her camera
<LordOnion> from Soho down to Brighton?
<SuzW> she knows all the #pub sites!
* Sawdust watches the bus leave without him :(
<Sybs> we might have played them all LordO :)
<Virgo10> I don't have the correct change
* SuzW grabs Sawdust by the back of his shirt and pulls him in
<LordOnion> but I ain't seen nutin like him...in any amusement hall
<Sybs> we shall be going past Buckingham Palace
<Sawdust> yikes!
<Sybs> I think we should stop cos the Queen often gets on the No 64 :)
<tessie_> oh I went by Buckingham :))
* JesseJ is not in his dress uniform..must hide from the Queen..
*Sybs crunches into first gear and manages to jolt the bus forward....
* Sawdust spills his beer
* SuzW flies into the seat in front
<LordOnion> *crunch*
* LordOnion falls
* Sybs turns round to see everyone in a heap on the floor
<Sybs> errmmmmm soory
<LordOnion> oh I think we oughta take a swim in the thames
<LordOnion> hehehe
* SuzW sits up
<JesseJ> I once puked in the Thames 30 years ago..I wonder if I can still find the spot..
* Sybs waits for everyone to settle back into their seats before attempting second gear
<Sybs> *crunch*
* LordOnion ponders just staying on the ground
* Sawdust panics as everyone is driving on the wrong side of the road
<Sybs> and its a one way street sawdust!!
<tessie_> lol
<JesseJ> dang Dusty they ain't Americanized yet !!!!
* Sybs gets into the swing of the gears
<tessie_> double clutch it Sybs!
* Sawdust tries to focus his camera but the bus is traveling too fast
* Sybs double clutches and stalls
<Sybs> ooooops
* SuzW hangs on for dear life
*Sawdust snaps a blurry picture of Harrods
*LordOnion just lays on the floor of the bus
<SFaulken> well folks, its been loads of fun, but I'm outa here for a while
<Sybs> perhaps I should do a commentary
<SuzW> bye SF!
* tessie_ sits behind Sybs
<LordOnion> look out SF...you'll fall off the bus!
* Sawdust white knuckles it
<SFaulken> not so LO =]
<SuzW> roll SF...just roll!!!!!!
* LordOnion sneaks up behind tess
* SFaulken mumbles a few words, and teleports off the bus
<Sybs> now on the left you can see the Thames...
* SuzW looks to the left
<JesseJ> lets go to somebody's house and mess around...
* SuzW hits her head on the window as the bus bounces
<Sawdust> is that where they hung all those people?
*** SFaulken has quit IRC (My Karma Ran Over Your Dogma)
* LordOnion puts his hands over sybs eyes
<JesseJ> No 10 Downing Street...that looks good..
<Sybs> ack, its gone dark
* Sybs swerves across two lanes and cuts two black cabs up
* SuzW pulls LordO's hands off syb's eyes as they cross lanes
<LordOnion> awww...her driving was improving!
<Sybs> hehe
* Sawdust blinks and misses the tower of london
* Sybs smiles that was fun
* SuzW takes pics of everyone on the bus
<Sybs> we are now travelling up pall mall
<LordOnion> should we all light up?
<SuzW> haha
* Sybs smiles for her pic but gets blinded by the flash
<Sybs> arrrghhhh
* Sawdust poses for suz...."does my green tint show well?"
<SuzW> *click*
<JesseJ> no...no pics...this is a sensitive government mission:))))
<Sybs> I cant see... someone else will have to take the wheel, make sure we dont go below 50!!! or the bus will blow!!!
* LordOnion smiles...and puts on his *evil eye* contacts for the picture
<LordOnion> 50 parsecs a second?
<SuzW> *click*
* Sybs slumps on the floor rubbing her eyes
* SuzW pushes LordO into the bus cockpit
<LordOnion> brb...
<SuzW> oh no bad choice!
<SuzW> he's brbing!
* Sawdust drops his drawers and (_!_) moons suz
<SuzW> *click*
<Sybs> I can see lots of different colours
<JesseJ> hey can you float these things..how about we all go to Paris..???
* SuzW pushes JesseJ into the driver's seat
<SuzW> I can't drive large vehicles or I'd do it myself
<tessie_> now I've never been to Paris
* Sawdust practices his french
<JesseJ> ohh shoot its all in metric....give me some time...???
* Sybs starts singing ... Roll Up for the magical mystery tour
<Sawdust> mon deau!
* Sybs points out the accelerator
<Sybs> there is a brake somewhere but I never had to use it
* Sawdust points out the DEcelerator
<JesseJ> if I could find just a a quater mile of free road I could get this thing in the air!!!
<LordOnion> back
<LordOnion> ooh a decelerator
<SuzW> you better copilot LordO
<LordOnion> I've never seen one on a car
* Sawdust wonders if we will be late with jesse driving?
<tessie_> heheheeh
* Sybs heads for the back seat of the bus
<SuzW> he's taking the bus up!
<LordOnion> (oooh the backseat)
<LordOnion> hehehe
* JesseJ pushes the throttles forward..slowly...
<Sybs> I felt it might be safer, but I am not so sure
* Sawdust watches all the empties roll to the back
<JesseJ> puts your seat belts on....
* SuzW straps herself in
* Sybs picks up the empties and looks for any remenants in the bottles
* SuzW watches the wings pop out
* Sybs fastens her seatbelt
<LordOnion> now this is an interesting turn of events
* LordOnion wonders what Vmc is on a bus
* Sawdust rolls to the back
* Sybs picks up Sawdust and fastens him in a seat
<JesseJ> this ain't so bad..hold on folks..were going UPPPPPPPPPPPPPP
<Sybs> arrrrrggghhh we haven't had the talk
<SuzW> *click*
* Sybs races to the front of the bus
<LordOnion> "the talk"?
<Sybs> the emergency exits are here, here and here
* SuzW grabs her safety instructions and watches Sybs
<Sawdust> "please bring your seat backs and tray tables to their upright and locked positions"
<Sybs> you can inflate your lifebelt by blowing thus
* Sawdust < blownose.wav >
<LordOnion> in case of an emergency run for the exits crushing the old and weak in your path
<tessie_> are we allowed to smoke on this bus?
<Sybs> tess, only cigarettes..... :)
<LordOnion> hehehe
<JesseJ> just cleared that dang thing..what ever it was...
<JesseJ> sure go ahead just stay away from the fuel...
<Sybs> there is also a nice whistle on the lifebelt which makes a nice tune
* Sawdust < whistle.wav >
* SuzW tries out the lifebelt…(soft whistling)
* Sawdust rings the flight attendant call button
<Sawdust> "Is this the flight to algiers?"
<JesseJ> okay...were at 2500 ft..naw..meters
<LordOnion> I love the smell of a jet in the morning!
* Sybs races down the aisle, what can I get you Sawdust?
<JesseJ> no dusty but there ain't no oxygen on this flight...
* SuzW sucks in the oxygen mask
<tessie_> think some brains are lacking oxygen ;)
* Sawdust looks out the window and sees.....water???
<JesseJ> okay..hey how come theres no compass on this bus..???
* Sybs goes and fetches the food trolley
<Sybs> who wants their plastic tray of food
<LordOnion> use the GPS...generally puzzling system
* SuzW rasies her hand
<Sawdust> ah....airplane food!
<LordOnion> oh me me!
<LordOnion> I love airline food
<tessie_> oh ... I thought this was a pinball toy ...
* Sybs whizzes trays to everyone
<JesseJ> ohh that thing..okay..lets head south...thats safe...
<tessie_> whizzes?
<Sybs> throws
<LordOnion> her what?
<SuzW> oh what's this anyway??
<LordOnion> jeeez
<tessie_> hehehe
* SuzW smells the lump
<Sawdust> "can I have another cup of coffee, please"
<Sybs> now no playing with the plastic cutlery
<Virgo10> South from here.... about 1500 miles ought to do it!
<LordOnion> hey...thats personal 9)
<SuzW> oh its spicy
<tessie_> last night's meal from chili's
<SuzW> hahahha
<SuzW> noooooo
* Sawdust looks down the aisle and sees......!!!!
<Sawdust> DON'T STEP IN IT!!!
<JesseJ> there's the English Channel down below folks....
* Big-Bird had enough
*LordOnion carves the cocktail ice into a sculpture of David
<SuzW> impressive LordO!
<LordOnion> jesse...I cleaned the compass for you
* Sybs looks out the window and sees a polar bear
* SuzW looks at the English channel
* Big-Bird steps off the end of the bus
<SuzW> *click*
<LordOnion> someone put a little black rock in it..I threw it away
<SuzW> no BB!!!!
<JesseJ> can some body bring the pilot a drink..its thirsty work driving this thing..
<LordOnion> thats not the english channel...thats the water running down the gutter
* Sybs brings Jesse the bottle of gin
<Virgo10> The people look like ants.... oh those are ants ;)
* Sybs heads up the aisle with the drinks trolley
<JesseJ> Sybs: you are a life saver...!!
* SuzW eats her meal like a good passenger
* Sawdust hands SuzW her telephoto lense...get a shot of that down there
* Big-Bird drops off
<SuzW> thanks Sawdust
<SuzW> *click*
* LordOnion wonders if jj needed the little black rock for the compass
<tessie_> Suz ... you not giving any of that food to the starving children over there?
<JesseJ> what children?
<LordOnion> those children in the corner
*SuzW passes her granola looking dessert to the children
* LordOnion flings his potatoes at the children
<JesseJ>..hey we got to put some more money in this thing .....
<LordOnion> quick quarters quarters
*LordOnion fumbles for change
<LordOnion> stupid rent by the hour planes
* Sawdust gets up and stands in line at the toilet
* JesseJ banks the bus over Caaen...
* Sybs looks at the time....
<Sybs> *sigh* it is time for me to go to sleep
* Sybs straps on her parachute
* tessie_ hands Sybs a pillow she isn't using
* Sybs hands over her trolley dolly hat to Suz, fill in for me please :)
<tessie_> tie this on your behind :))
<SuzW> bye sybs!!!!!!!
* SuzW puts on her flight attendant uniform
<Sybs> hehehehe tess, not sure its needed I have plenty of padding :)
<LordOnion> dont' forget to write!
* Sawdust < flush.wav >
<Sybs> good seeing you all too
<LordOnion> oh yeah...bring out the sexy stewardesses baby!
* Sawdust heads back to his seat with toilet paper stuck to his shoe
<Virgo10> Happy landing Sybs!
<SuzW> take her down quickly Jesse!
* Sybs leaps out the plane and pulls the ripcord
<tessie_> Byeeeeeee Sybs!
*Syb 's parachute inflates and she floats gently to the ground *thump*
<Sybs> byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
<SuzW> byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
*** Sybs has quit IRC (Read error to Sybs[usr336-kno.cableinet.co.uk]: EOF from client)
* Sawdust hollars down at sybs "watch out for blue ice!!"
<JesseJ> that wasn't a chute it was my dirty laundry bag...
<tessie_> LOL
<Virgo10> haha
<SuzW> she's a good swimmer
<Sawdust> jesse...time to bring this sucker in for a landing...
<Sawdust> everyone back there is green
* tessie_ straps in tightly
<tessie_> gets in the position for a crash landing
* SuzW picks up empty drinks and plates
<JesseJ> okay..you guys strap in...any religious types on board??
* Sawdust starts chanting his mantra...I will survive this...I will survive this...
* tessie_ tries to remember how to say her last confession
<JesseJ> say your holy holys...
* SuzW pushes the cart to the back and jumps in a seat
* Sawdust < hallel.wav >
* JesseJ sees the Eiffel Tower.. and a piece of land that looks good...
* Sound request: can't find 'airplane.wav'
[tessie_ SOUND]
* Sawdust < atc.wav >
* Sound request: can't find 'airplnsurely.wav'
[Virgo10 SOUND]
* JesseJ lowers the landing gear on a london bus..flaps down..
* SuzW waits for what seems an eternity for the bus to land
* Sound request: can't find 'airlady.wav'
[tessie_ SOUND]
* Sound request: can't find 'topgun3b.wav'
[tessie_ SOUND]
<JesseJ> slight angle of approach...
* Sound request: can't find 'notdead.wav'
[Virgo10 SOUND]
<JesseJ> up.. just a taste...
* Sawdust watches jesse line up on the localizer
<JesseJ> God loves Jessie...
* SuzW closes her eyes tight
<JesseJ> bump..bump..bump.......
<tessie_> oh noooooooooo
<JesseJ> hey kids were on the ground...
* SuzW opens her eyes
<tessie_> yeah but put on the brakes!!!!!
* SuzW feels like Dorothy landing in Oz
<JesseJ> tell all these frog drivers ..I had to put it down..anywhere...
<Sawdust> "please be careful opening overhead bins, because your bags WILL have shifted during flight"
<JesseJ> any one want to see Napoleans tomb...we're there...:)))
* SuzW collects her belongings
<tessie_> as long as you don't bury me next to him and call me Josephine!
<SuzW> I hope my luggage made it
<JesseJ> hey lets hock this bus and party on the money:)))
<SuzW> sounds good!
* SuzW hops of the bus
<SuzW> good thing I took plenty of pics
<JesseJ> I won't ask for a tip..that would be too much...:))
* Sawdust waits for that grey haired lady in front of him to waddle to the exit
* tessie_ tips her hat for jesse
<JesseJ> thanks tess..I'll remenber that the next time I take you for a fantasy flight...:))
<tessie_> fantasy?
<tessie_> that was REAL to me :)))
* Sawdust fantasizes